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James Restell - my son and best friend

 
#1 James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 01:04

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com)

On Friday night the Restell world stopped turning. My 3½ year old boy was bouncing around the hospital ward, oblivious to the fact he'd just been diagnosed with Leukaemia.

James is my best friend and a source of immense pride and inspiration. Someone whose infectious smile and good health I've always taken for granted. Not any more.

But my how we all savoured this last weekend, finding laughter and pleasure in daily routines that could so easily have been considered a series of chores.

My outlook on life will never be the same again, that much is for sure.

Quite why I'm writing this I don't really know - but somehow it feels like a burden shared is a burden halved. So thank you for indulging me and I hope never to experience this sickening feeling again.

Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#2 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 01:41

Taxman to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony, I cant say anything to help anyone, however have to say something, that something I think is that you and your wife will see things differently, your son will not as this is his life, it will be all he is used to or knows, therefore he will still be the same person he was when he was two.

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#3 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 06:40

Cecilia to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony, my pray goes to James and your family.

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#4 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 08:51

Cynic to Cecilia (#3)

Tony, I know next to nothing about leukaemia, but I do know that you and your family will successfully adapt to the new circumstances, once the initial shock is over. Keep your head high during these tough times - these challenges are sent to test us. Our thoughts are with you.

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#5 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 09:40

Tom Barton to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony - while this is devestating news, I hope you and your wife will be able to take pleasure and joy in being part of your son's life for each day brought to you. My thoughts and prayers go with you. Tom

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#6 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 10:39

chameleon to Tom Barton (#5)

Tony,

Having met you, I know you're going to approach this with the same outlook that has seen you gain many friends here.

Although it might sound strange - but something truly magnificent will come out of this - and you'll find it if you haven't already.

All thoughts with you.

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#7 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 11:02

Tim to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

So sorry to hear this. Best wishes to you and the family at this hard time.

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#8 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 11:16

santosh to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony ,

I wonder - what causes this in 3 and 1/2 year old.

Our prayers with you.

With Regards

Santosh

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#9 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 11:28

DV to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this difficult challenge.

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#10 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 11:54

Mars A Day to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

A cousin of mine was diagnosed with this some years ago, fought it and has been clear for the last 5 or 6 years. It's beatable.

Tony your son sounds a healthy and strong young man - he will beat this.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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#11 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 12:58

Tushar Chitra to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Dear Tony,

though i have not met you before, your words moved me to write to you. Please keep the faith, and be the inspiration which you need to be for your son. He will FIGHT this and WIN. but for that he needs you and your family, not in the mode of sadness and gloom but one of vigour, courage, laughter and most important the spirit to win.

I lost a child hence I perhaps have some sense of what you may be feeling.

Keep the faith, there is a super controller somewhere above us.

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#12 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 13:56

ZB to Tushar Chitra (#11)

Tony,

This sounds like a mighty challenge, for you and your wife and especially for James. I'm not going to say I know what you are going through.I don't.

All I can say is I'm sure you'll find it in your capacity to cope, to adapt and to support your son. He'll need all the love, support and strength there is out there. And you need to remain strong and never forget to stop beleiving.

ZB

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#13 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 15:14

baykus to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

So sorry to hear this. It may, however, be successfully be treated, so as hard as it may be, try to stay positive, as your son will need this. With luck, this will only be a passing scare.

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#14 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 20:46

Jack Sparrow to baykus (#13)

Tony - I've got a child on the way and even as a prospective parent the C word fills me with terror.

Whilst I can't begin to grasp what you are going through, I hope you and your family find strength and courage. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Best wishes to little James.

/JS

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#15 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 20:57

Char Vitale to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Your life will change. It changed for us when we learned our only grandson had cerebral palsy. Of course I know that is entirely different than lukemia, and he has excellent prospects of kicking it in the butt, but you and he will be OK. Your will survive and be better for it. - char

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#16 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
26/05/2009 23:06

Bob to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony,

Although we haven't met, I have followed your posts and twitters closely, and wanted to send you my sympathies regarding the news of your son's leukaemia. At the same time I would like to encourage you to find the strength, faith and hope to get through this difficult time, and will be praying for the best outcome for your son.

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#17 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
27/05/2009 00:04

Roxana to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony,

Although I have never met you, I can safely say your coaching has given hope and inspiration to so many of us. I sincerely hope you get through this tough time.

Our thoughts are with you and your family.

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#18 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
27/05/2009 09:23

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Roxana (#17)

A big thank you to everyone for your support. My inbox is overloaded with 350+ emails from readers and clients, including many with first-hand experience of friends and family who've come through this. I'm quite overwhelmed and touched by the response - thank you.

Having worked through the treatment schedule with the specialist yesterday - and buoyed by your input - I firmly believe we can get through this and that we'll all come out the other end stronger for it.

Tony

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#19 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
27/05/2009 22:23

Sonja Jefferson to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#18)

Tony,

My thoughts and good luck to all your family through your son's treatment.

I have a 10 year old niece who had leukemia at 6 months - she's gorgeous. Not sure if this helps, but wanted to give you my support.

Sonja

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#20 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
28/05/2009 12:02

Aussie to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony

Sorry to hear the news. It's hard but keep chin up mate. All things happen for a eason. My best thoughts and wishes to you and family.

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#21 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
28/05/2009 14:13

Ioannis Dermitzakis to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony, My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family and wish you strength.

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#22 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
28/05/2009 14:50

Blunt to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#18)

Tony,

So sorry to hear about James. I am sure you have alot of support, family and friends. The main focus is to be strong, be happy and to support James through his life. There are loads of information and support groups, medical specialists and so forth. You have the support.

Be strong.

Blunt

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#23 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
29/05/2009 01:58

Brad Egeland to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony - thanks for the ad on Twitter and then I followed it to this post. My prayers are with you. I have a large family - 7 children - and I can't imagine going through what you're going through. My thoughts are with you and thanks for sharing. Keep us posted.... Brad

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#24 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
29/05/2009 01:59

Brad Egeland to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Tony - thanks for the ad on Twitter and then I followed it to this post. My prayers are with you. I have a large family - 7 children - and I can't imagine going through what you're going through. My thoughts are with you and thanks for sharing. Keep us posted.... Brad

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#25 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
31/05/2009 22:52

hardhat to Brad Egeland (#24)

Tony - Very sorry indeed to read this and I echo the thoughts of the above. A relative of mine had this many years ago. Mars A Day is quite right, it is beatable.

Like Cynic I'm not an expert but much funding and research has gone into battling this over the years. The word is that chances have improved as a result, and particularly amongst children.

Keep taking the best care/advice from the specialists so the Restell's can beat this - you deserve nothing less.

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#26 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/06/2009 09:42

R2D2 to hardhat (#25)

Tony - my very best wishes and thoughts to you and your family at what is a difficult time.

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#27 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/06/2009 15:25

paul to R2D2 (#26)

Tony,

I don’t know you – other than through this forum, but your post absolutely knocked me sideways this morning. I wish you and your family all the best.

Draw strength from those close to you and also from the simple fact that kids are deceptively resilient – from your description your son sounds like a tenacious, strong young chap.

Not sure if you’ve read Daniel Goleman’s Social Intelligence, but it explains powerfully the physiological benefits experienced in surrounding those battling illness with love and attention – I doubt either of those will be in short supply for you all.

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#28 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
12/06/2009 12:18

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to paul (#27)

For all those who asked that I keep you posted about James's progress, I'm delighted to say he's responding very well to treatment. This week we had back the bone marrow tests from the 8 day test and James only has 3% Leukaemic cells left. What the Doctors are looking for is for this to have fallen below 25% fifteen days after treatment starts. So he’s massively surpassed in 8 days what they’d hoped he’d achieve in 15 days. This is great news as speed of response in the first weeks is considered the leading indicator of how likely a successful outcome is going to be from the whole course of treatment.

So thank you for all your support!

The whole experience has us thinking about charitable activities we can undertake in support of others in similar situations. Imogen's <a href=http://bit.ly/menH8>doing a charity run for Cancer Research</a> and the Doctors have "suggested" I might choose to have my head shaved in support of James when he loses his hair later this summer - so watch this space for details of that!!

Anyway thanks to everyone who helped pick us up in our hour of need. You're a fantastic group of friends, readers and colleagues

Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#29 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
12/06/2009 12:23

Cynic to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#28)

That is great news Tony!! Some truly good news to start the weekend.

And I'm looking forward to seeing photos of you with your hair shaved in due course! ;-)

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#30 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
13/06/2009 10:26

R2D2 to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#28)

Wonderful news and very welcome. Well done and best wishes

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#31 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
15/06/2009 11:06

Lincoln to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#28)

Congratulations on the news so far - Fingers crossed for James, it all sounds like it's moving in the right direction.

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#32 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
16/06/2009 11:39

Mars A Day to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#28)

Great news - very encouraging and goes to show James is a strong young man with a fighting constitution. He'll be a terror on the rugby field in years to come.

After a weekend of flu this is a real boost - keep us updated Tony.

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#33 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
20/06/2009 08:08

CG to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#28)

Sounds very promising Tony. My cousin recovered after 2 rounds of chemo...that was years ago and he's fighting fit. I'm sure that James is going to come out on top in this one.

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#34 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
22/06/2009 22:33

Smithie to CG (#33)

Tony, your post puts many things into perspective. On a site where most posts are about materialistic topics - money, status, redundancies etc... all of which fall into insignificance in comparison. Hope James' treatment continues to be a success.

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#35 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 13:25

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Smithie (#34)

I've been inundated these last weeks with clients and readers emailing to ask how James' treatment is progressing - and worried that my lack of update here on the forum might signify something bad.

So firstly thank you to everyone who has reached out and supported us, it really is touching and humbling to think of all the people out there who have had us in their thoughts.

Also a +ve update for you. James started school in September and his condition has been so favourable that he's been able to get on and enjoy classes just like any other kid. He's now 10 days into a period of more intensive chemotherapy that'll last through until December. Most children are hit pretty hard by this, but again the consultants are amazed by how well he's holding up. Long may it continue.

So in short the first 5 months of treatment have gone just about as well as we could have hoped for - and our outlook on everything else in life has certainly changed too.

Thanks to all for your support

Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#36 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 13:39

Siba to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

That's very good news Tony. Best wishes for James and I am sure he will fight it out..

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#37 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 13:42

Cynic to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

It's great to hear some positive news like this. Obviously it's still very tough times for the Restells - but it sounds like you have a lot of support and are well equipped to handle it all. I know there are a lot of people out there (myself included) sending positive thoughts your way.

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#38 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 13:59

Eve to Cynic (#37)

Wonderful to hear and great that he was able to start school.

May his good progress continue.

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#39 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 14:19

Mars A Day to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

Immensely encouraging to hear - Tony keep us updated.

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#40 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 14:20

Mars A Day to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

Immensely encouraging to hear - Tony keep us updated.

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#41 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 15:11

chameleon to Mars A Day (#40)

fantastic news...

Must be that same steely determination and positive outlook that's been passed down.... great news.

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#42 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 18:33

Pasha to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

Great encouraging news to hear Tony. All the best to the family,keep us updated

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#43 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
01/10/2009 21:52

Andrew to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#35)

Nice.

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#44 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
04/10/2009 15:52

hardhat to Andrew (#43)

Thats the way, Tony.

PS Don't expect any faltering in our well-wishing though!

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#45 Running for Leukaemia charity
05/01/2010 16:12

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to hardhat (#44)

Well Christmas for us this year certainly took on a special importance, as you can well imagine. Several nights were spent in hospital, though fortunately only to treat a pesky infection. Chemo treatment continues to do the job, just leaves James prone to infection.

Reflecting over the Xmas period I got to thinking I should do something for others finding themselves in this predicament. And so having never run more than 400 metres competitively before, I’ve recently signed up to attempt 40 times that in the Great South Run which I'll be running for Leukaemia Research! As my last competitive training was some 17 years ago for the novice rowing boat at Uni, I’ll be kicking off training with some trepidation!!

Have set up a JustGiving page and any readers or clients who'd like to support the cause that'd be most appreciated:

<a href=http://www.justgiving.com/Tony-Restell>http://www.justgiving.com/Tony-Restell</a>

Rgds, Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#46 RE: Running for Leukaemia charity
19/10/2010 11:18

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#45)

I've been overwhelmed by donations from the Top-Consultant readership and my consulting network in the last days, as my charity run this weekend draws near. Thank you to <b>everyone</b> who has supported my drive to raise £5k for Leukaemia Research (<a href=http://www.justgiving.com/Tony-Restell>details here</a>)

By way of an update, James made it through his intensive chemotherapy earlier this year and had his chemotherapy line removed over the summer, just in time for his 5th birthday. He's on great form and now just has the low intensity medication to take for the next 18 months to see through the full treatment programme.

Thank you all for your support since this news broke some 18 months ago - it's been a great source of strength in what have been difficult times.

And for anyone going to the Great South Run in Portsmouth this Sunday, I'll be sporting the fluorescent Leukaemia Research running top and hitting the finish line around the 1h45 mark!!

Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#47 RE: Running for Leukaemia charity
19/10/2010 11:33

Shoe Polisher to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#46)

Good news Tony.

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#48 RE: Running for Leukaemia charity
19/10/2010 11:50

R2D2 to Shoe Polisher (#47)

Really great to hear that your son is doing well Tony.

Best Wishes

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#49 RE: Running for Leukaemia charity
19/10/2010 12:45

someguy to R2D2 (#48)

Good to hear and best of luck to little James...

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#50 RE: Running for Leukaemia charity
19/10/2010 18:34

Jack Sparrow to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#46)

super news - so pleased

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#51 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
19/10/2010 19:50

UP North to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Hi Tony,

It certainly puts a lot of postings on this site in perspective. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.....

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#52 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
21/10/2010 16:33

Zen_Master to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#1)

Many bodies One Soul............we are in Gods hands....

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#53 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
25/10/2010 12:43

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Zen_Master (#52)

Thank you everyone - over £5.5k raised as of this morning, a fantastic response. Really appreciated and makes the aching limbs all the more worthwhile!

Tony Restell

Top-Consultant.com

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#54 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
25/10/2010 16:48

Jack Boyce to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#53)

Deeply moved by your story and your positive attitude

Delighted to hear of the positive news to date and the bravery and commitment of your family. I bet James is very proud of his daddy (provided he didn't come last in the race !)

Please keep us posted on all developments.

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#55 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
23/07/2012 13:55

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Jack Boyce (#54)

Today's a momentous day in the Restell family. James completed his 3+ years of chemotherapy this weekend and so this is the first day he's awoken not needing to take medication or worry what the future holds. He's now nearly 7 years old and can barely remember a time when he wasn't battling leukaemia.

I've had so many messages of support and so many people asking after James during these last years that I just wanted to share our uplifting news. Thanks everyone!

It goes without saying that I very much hope none of you are ever affected by childhood leukaemia - but if you are then please feel free to reach out if I can provide support or reassurance in any way.

Regards,

Tony Restell

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#56 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
23/07/2012 14:29

Mr Cool to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#55)

Fantastic news. Truly a sunny, sunny day.

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#57 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
23/07/2012 17:47

marsday to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#55)

I just knew someone was making the sun shine! I'm so pleased to read your news about James.

Fantastic.

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#58 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
25/07/2012 00:07

Malcolm12boxes to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#55)

So pleased to read your news Tony. It's been a long haul hasn't it.

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#59 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
15/08/2012 06:44

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to Malcolm12boxes (#58)

Thanks for all your support, it's been really appreciated throughout

Tony

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#60 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
23/08/2012 12:24

skb to Malcolm12boxes (#58)

James is a real hero- a true fighter- wish him all the best

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#61 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
24/05/2016 07:53

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to skb (#60)

Just had the 7 year anniversary of this ordeal. Pleased to say all is well - thank you to everyone who still to this day asks after James in meetings and on calls. It's hugely appreciated.

For anyone battling with similar circumstances right now, my thoughts are with you and hang in there. There's light at the end of the tunnel - and more so with every month of medical advances that passes. Some amazing cures being developed, hopefully not long until many of these worries are a thing of the past.

Tony

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#62 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
24/05/2016 09:46

Bushy Eyebrow Partner to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#61)

So pleased to hear this. It's so easy to take our seemingly humdrum everyday lives for granted, when in fact they are so so special. You've obviously been through a nightmare decade, but have emerged from it stronger and hopefully now can fully enjoy every single day together! He's lucky to have a strong dad who has held it all together so well!

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#63 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
24/05/2016 15:38

Mr Cool to Bushy Eyebrow Partner (#62)

+1

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#64 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
27/05/2016 06:04

Dan! Dan! Dan! to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#61)

I've a 7 month old daughter. On the spectrum of all the people I know, I've always been toward the rational, calm, unemotional, probably arrogant end. And yet every time she bangs her head or scratches her face I feel my heart stop. I honestly don't know if I'd make it thru something like that, when of course she'd need me the most. All this to say massive respect to you. Looks like you were exactly the rock your son needed.

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#65 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
27/05/2016 21:24

CaffeineUseDisorder to Bushy Eyebrow Partner (#62)

+1

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#66 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
31/05/2016 13:10

marsday to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#61)

It's events like this which make the so called 'big stuff' look small.

20 years from now, when a highly successful James is telling the anecdote of the biggest fight of his life (and for his life) I hope the support and will of his father is central to that story.

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#67 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
31/05/2016 18:27

Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) to marsday (#66)

Thanks everyone. Really appreciate the words of support - and all I can say is that in challenging times like that you find yourself and those around you capable of handling situations that you'd have thought would floor you. All the best, Tony

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#68 RE: James Restell - my son and best friend
07/06/2016 06:09

Camster to Tony Restell (Top-Consultant.com) (#67)

+1

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